First Corinthians 13 is known as the love chapter. You often hear it read during weddings. If you do a superficial read of the chapter, you can apply it to weddings, but this chapter is much deeper than that.
In first John 4 verse 16 we read that God is love. Since God is love, we can get a better picture of what God is by substituting the word love for God in that chapter. In first Corinthians 13, we learn God is:
- Patient
- Kind
- He doesn’t boast
- He is not proud
- He is not self-seeking
- He is not easily angered
- He doesn’t keep record of wrongdoing
- He doesn’t delight in evil but rejoices in the truth
- He always hopes, trusts, and perseveres
So this chapter is basically an autobiography of what God is and what He wants us to be like as we grow up in Him. This doesn’t belong in your wedding vows! It is a letter about God’s character and the model of what we should be to all people. Can you see all that in the person of Jesus? I can.
Oh, this passage says that without love we’re like a clanging cymbal. If you’ve ever been in a band or orchestra (I have!) next to a cymbal, you know that they’re loud and not pleasant to hear up close, and you certainly wouldn’t want to hear the whole song of sustained cymbal clanging. Well, that’s what we sound like if we don’t have love.
I can be a bit of a jerk.
(Lots of people excusing their lack of love.)
I’m sure you’ve heard it from lots of people, as have I. They are usually right about their self-assessment! What they don’t know is God and His spirit can transform them into person of love. When the Holy Spirit works in a person’s life, they go from the clanging cymbal that you don’t want to be around to somebody you were drawn to because they are comfortable to be around. You don’t feel like you have to walk on egg shells to be around them because their love is genuine and unconditional.
How I can relate this passage and work it into a wedding? Ladies, that list above… check off those boxes if your man is like that or becoming like that. Listen to how his mother describes him. Most moms will inadvertently tell you what their son is like. You want to hear things like he has a heart for God. You don’t want to hear, “Oh, he struggles but he always comes back to church” (huge red flag).
The man you want is one who is going to stick with you and gets together with other believers. You don’t have to coax him to do this; he does it because of his relationship with God. If he has relationship struggles with his parents, that’s also a red flag. Unresolved baggage doesn’t disappear, it makes things worse and breaks up marriages.
The best way to marry a Christian is to only date Christians.
It’s Biblical!
If you’re already in a marriage and struggling because your man doesn’t have a heart for God, become a person of prayer. Pray like his life depends on it, because it does. Everyone assumes that the sheep and the goats story is about the world and about the church. It’s not. The world doesn’t say things like, “Lord, we did this.” That’s what the lukewarm church says. Jesus’ response to them is clear. “I never knew you.”
This type of love in first Corinthians 13 is what God can work in our lives with the help of the Holy Spirit – we can’t manufacture it. Pray for love to grow in you. Pray for supernatural transformation in your life. God can do it!
Following Jesus 